Sunday, 20 September 2009

MrsM as Role Model

Thank you for your thought-provoking comments
on my last post.

MissM and I discussed the post
and we agreed that it was carelessly written.

She complained that it was unfair
because she can sew and knit
and has made some lovely things to wear.

I explained that I wanted to contrast
my sewing experience with hers
and said how much I regretted the fact
that I did not have the opportunity
to teach her to sew as I had been taught.

We agreed that, while it would be delightful
if we could spend more time together doing crafts,
it is not very realistic at the moment because
she is preparing for university entrance
and I am working full time.

MissM pointed out that it was more helpful to her
to learn ways of combining work with family life
because that was the world that she would be living in.

It was a new perspective on my role as a mother
and I am very grateful for it.

It also has the advantage that anything I can contribute
is equally applicable to MasterM,
who is highly unlikely to make his own clothes
however much time I spend with him.


  1. He may not make his own clothes, but he would be wise to know how to wash, dry, iron and fold them. Nothing makes a young man more of a catch than the ability to be self-sufficient.

    Given his adventures, I'm sure that he is completely self-sufficient!

  2. But do you feel the same about not spending time on other subjects?! Although my eventual conclusion was that needlework now, unlike in the 19th century, is not so utterly imbricated in the construction of female identity, and women are now free to pursue it as a form of creativity. But I think possibly work with the needle is still in opposition to certain constructions of male identity!

    Pomona x

  3. I loved this take on the mother/daughter relationship, there are so many sides.
    I also agree with peppermintpatcher.

  4. Before having children I always said the best gifts I could offer my son would be to ensure he knew who to play piano and how to give a foot massage. Withthese two skills a man can go anywhere in the world.

    I feel like such a failure ;-)

  5. Miss M is so perceptive - a clever girl, obviously runs in the family

  6. Very impressed with Miss M and her mature outlook (as always). K x

  7. I think that Miss M is very wise indeed... and I'm quite sure that has come from her mother.

  8. I had sewing lessons from a friend of my mother's; my mum in return gave piano lessons to her friend's son. They both knew where their strengths lay.

    In the end, I neither sew nor play the piano, but my mother is still a daily, much-loved, indispensable - and bonkers - part of my adult life.

    I don't know that she taught me much in terms of creative skills, but I wouldn't swop her for the world.


Thank you! I love reading your comments and even though I don't always have time to reply I am really grateful to every one who joins in the conversation.