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MissM is exasperated with MrsM.
Back ache!
WHY do you think that you have back ache?
Because you have so much STUFF in your bag
and half of it is for Justin*.
You don't NEED to carry wet wipes for me any more.
And now you want to buy another BIG bag
which is IDENTICAL to the one you already have.
You should have a smaller bag and be more organised.
And don't even THINK about a different colour:
you couldn't cope with brown
so blue is absolutely out of the question.
Don't waste my time
Just ask if they do this one in BLACK.
It is TRAGIC.
MrsM meekly beckons the shop assistant.
*that would be my pal, Justin Case.
Back ache!
WHY do you think that you have back ache?
Because you have so much STUFF in your bag
and half of it is for Justin*.
You don't NEED to carry wet wipes for me any more.
And now you want to buy another BIG bag
which is IDENTICAL to the one you already have.
You should have a smaller bag and be more organised.
And don't even THINK about a different colour:
you couldn't cope with brown
so blue is absolutely out of the question.
Don't waste my time
Just ask if they do this one in BLACK.
It is TRAGIC.
MrsM meekly beckons the shop assistant.
*that would be my pal, Justin Case.
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Just last week I ate sushi by the beach and was very glad of the wet wipes in my bag. I congratulate you on your forward thinking.
ReplyDeleteI never have wet wipes when I need them, or rather when two small still often sticky boys need them! But big bags do strain the back and shoulders!
ReplyDeleteIs that really YOUR MissM speaking and not mine? If I hesitate for a moment looking for something in my bag while with my own darling I get a brusk "Streamline Mom, streamline!" I dare say in time your MissM will be reduced to fewer words as well, as they can't teach us new tricks. My wipes are always in the car when I am in a ladies room without paper towels.
ReplyDeleteI am very averse to large bags, precisely because of the back and shoulder problems they cause me. Excess keys are jettisoned, as is loose change because of the weight. I also hate having to rummage. I make my own bags now with customised pockets which I am gradually refining. I think I would ideally have a collection of those gathered bags dangling from my belt like a concierge. There would have to be one for Wet Wipes though. I'm with you on that.
ReplyDeleteAs the mother of the child who barfed into my cupped hands while approaching the x-ray machine at the airport, I say "all hail to women armed with wet-wipes".
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you explained who Justin was!
First, Oh Ali!
ReplyDeleteThen, MissM doesn't want to meet me OR my bag(s).
Ciao
Clearly Miss M has yet to become a qualified commuter. If a pair of flats, umbrella, purse, book, bottle of water, neurofen, pashmina, diary, ipod, map, phone, camera, sunglasses and travelcard cannot fit into the bag then it is a purse and will frankly not do.
ReplyDeleteI must confess that may be how I sounded when I ordered my mother to the doctors on Sunday. Oh dear.
So you won't be buying a Hermes Kelly then?
ReplyDeletePlease tell dear Miss M that my own mother still carries wet wipes for me xxxx
ReplyDeleteoh
ReplyDeletethe
shame.
(Do you think Grace had wipes in her Hermes bag?)
(Wipes? Dear lord.)
I love this post so much I have to chime in again...
ReplyDeleteMy bet is the two women in the background of the photo are armed with every possible necessity for the streamlined well heeled Mother and her darling. An entourage or Momma with a bulky bag, those are the choices.
This reminded me that I was once at school with a Justin - Justin Thyme. What were his parents thinking of. In later life he used his second name, Bob!
ReplyDeleteStill carry wet wipes around I'm afraid but I've bought one of those 'back bags'!
MrM thinks that MrsM could do a reprise of her toaster genealogy post but based on her stock of handbags. Might have to spread it over several posts though.
ReplyDeleteMissM of course has reused one of MrsM's old handbags to much admiration from her friends although MrsM cannot fathom why she would want to do this. MrM thoroughly approves of this recycling strategy of course.
quickly I have found the need for wet wipes and a larger back. The older you get the more things you need to carry. How I wish I could "streamline" and be more organized. I just can't. My bag is a bottomless pit of all the goodies I "might" need.
ReplyDeletegorgeous photo.
ReplyDeletei think i've had that conversation with my mother...albeit 20 yrs ago and now i carry a handbag resembling a suitcase. oh dear.
she doesn't beat about the bush, does she!!
ReplyDeleteIs now a good time to mention that I rarely use a bag? If it won't fit into my wallet or pockets then it is not coming.
ReplyDeleteThis is of course unless I am travelling somewhere with children (mine or anyone else's). Then I carry a mahoosive big shopping bag that will accommodate the wipes, tissues, plastic bags, cameras, jumpers, stones, rocks, sticks, bit of manky feather, pine cones, important scraps of paper, ice-cream wrappers, raincoats, sunscreen, hats, knitting and crafty paraphenalia I know will be required at some point during the trip.
I list to one side because of a lifetime of bags full of stuff I might need.................
ReplyDeleteI see it as my quest in life to continue the search for that holy Grail, the bag of my dreams and I can never be sure until I've road tested it for a while. I'm currently on my 1654th model , a very nice leather rucksack to combat the increasing list to the right, the copious contents and the nagging shoulder pain (yes even 3 versions of the healthy back bag failed ...I thought red might be more comfortable than black but I was mistaken.)I hate to say it but I might finally have cracked it which almost feels disappointing.
ReplyDeletePssssst - I carry a backpack these days as my big bag hurt my shoulders (just ask my physio). I still carry as much stuff, but it's evenly distributed. At the moment I think it's half full of apples the Smalls collected at the Orchard.
ReplyDeleteBut the Kelly Bag is most definitely elegant. So big can be beautiful.
ReplyDeleteAnd we had a boy in my elementary school class named Matt Case--we always thought his mum should have named him Justin!
K x
or Knut
ReplyDeleteAh ha, she is a girl of wise words but I bet you bought the big bag anyway. Searching for the perfect bag is rather my life's work you know. I know just what I want and sometimes I think I have found it but a month or two later it becomes apparent that perfection has eluded me once again.
ReplyDeleteNever mind wipes, I still carry a small first aid kit, a big camera, a purse bulging with receipts and loose change, several folded shopping bags, tissues, a scarf, an emergency snack, assorted fliers, Waitrose recipe cards, a book and of course always the smattering of litter that the children pop into my bag while we are out, apparently under the impression that my bag is some sort of bringalong dustbin.
You don't need to carry wet wipes? Does that time ever come?
ReplyDeleteYou do carry crayons and plasters, though, right?